The art of “Puttering” towards Rest and Relaxation: What the Gurus Don’t Tell You.

From wellness retreats to mindfulness apps, the market is flooded with promises of achieving ultimate tranquility. Yet, amid the sea of self-proclaimed gurus and wellness influencers, there's a side of the story that often goes untold. In this blog, we will talk about “puttering” to unveil the truth about rest and relaxation that these gurus may not always emphasize.

The Pursuit Puttering Towards  Perfect Relaxation

I love the word putter. But what does it mean? A duck putters around a pond and a person putters around the house on the weekend, aimlessly occupying oneself on small tasks and not focusing on anything in particular. It frees my mind to rest and I feel content because I have no agenda. 

So how does the desire to want to “putter” be a clue to how we can relax more and release the need for striving?

It's no secret that the desire for relaxation has led to the rise of an entire industry dedicated to promoting wellness. Whether it's lavish spa vacations or subscription-based meditation apps, the options seem endless. But do these avenues truly deliver the promised nirvana?

According to Dr. Matthew Walker, a renowned sleep scientist, the idea of achieving perfect relaxation is a myth perpetuated by the wellness industry. He points out that relaxation is a natural process that cannot be forced. The pressure to attain an ideal state of relaxation can lead to more stress and anxiety, defeating the purpose altogether!

The Productivity Trap

One often overlooked aspect of the relaxation narrative is its connection to productivity. In a culture that celebrates constant hustle, relaxation is often positioned as a means to recharge and enhance performance. However, this mindset can inadvertently turn relaxation into another task on our never-ending to-do list.

So why not putter instead? Look at relaxation as the art of nothing goal-orientated.

Psychologist Oliver Burkeman warns against falling into the "efficiency trap." He argues that constantly seeking ways to optimize relaxation can transform it into an extension of work rather than a genuine break. Instead of trying to make every moment productive, he suggests embracing unstructured leisure time as a way to truly unwind.

So instead of always having a plan, have a plan to putter and see where your day takes you. Let your leisurely schedule feel easy and fun. There’s no goal in puttering and no pressure to putter!

Mindfulness and Guilt

Mindfulness practices, which have gained tremendous popularity in recent years, are often touted as the ultimate path to relaxation. While mindfulness techniques can indeed be beneficial, they are not a one-size-fits-all solution. Moreover, they can sometimes lead to feelings of guilt and inadequacy when individuals struggle to achieve the desired level of inner peace. It is a practice after all, and sometimes the mind wants results the first time. 

Psychiatrist Dr. Judson Brewer suggests that rather than aiming for a Zen-like state, we should approach mindfulness with a sense of curiosity. Being present in the moment doesn't necessarily mean eliminating all thoughts and stressors; it's about observing them without judgment and with curiosity. 

And how can you apply this theory to puttering? Just observe yourself doing and being in whatever activity you embark on. 

The Social Media Facade

In today's digital age, social media platforms are flooded with images of people basking in idyllic relaxation settings. From serene beach vacations to picturesque mountain getaways, these images can create unrealistic expectations and fuel a sense of FOMO (fear of missing out). I say forget all that! Experience JOMO (joy of missing out). So putter away!

Research psychologist Dr. Linda Papadopoulos emphasizes the importance of distinguishing between genuine relaxation and curated social media content. Constantly comparing our downtime to others' highlight reels can lead to feelings of inadequacy and prevent us from finding joy in our restful moments. 

The pursuit of rest and relaxation is a deeply personal journey, and there's no one-size-fits-all formula for achieving it. The gurus and wellness influencers may offer valuable insights, but it's essential to remember that their narratives aren't the complete story. And you always have a choice about that!

The truth about rest and relaxation lies in embracing imperfection, letting go of productivity pressures, and finding solace in the simple, unfiltered moments of leisure. 

So why not try puttering and see where it takes you? You may be surprised at how much it can do for you - free from the constraints of comparison and societal expectations.

Learn more about rest and relaxation techniques with Empathic Yoga here.